He knew why they had handed out noise cancelling headphones at the entrance. After all, this was not a normal party, and even though listening collectively to the same music with headphones seriously limited social interaction, a version of reality Gustav totally supported, he still felt vaguely insulted by the obedient secrecy of it all. Not that long ago, he was just a nerd who loved Kraftwerk, but now that very same love made him an aberration, a pervert almost. With a predominantly male fan base, a rationality score of 95% and a mathematical precision index of 0.986 Kraftwerk was officially classified as gender-specific music. As a result, Kraftwerk’s music was banned from public life, only to be enjoyed under strict conditions, at parties like this one, minimising the impact on normal people.

Gustav felt lost. Loving the music is one thing, but being surrounded by men didn’t fulfil his other desires. The model (1978) was nowhere to be seen. She would never arrive, not in this life, not in his life. It was not his first Kraftwerk party, he knew the drill, how it would end, how he would end up in his own bed, alone.

‘Better beat the inevitable and get some more sleep’, Gustav thought, and made his way to the exit, completely unaware that Stella, a lifelong fan of Coldplay, made exactly the same decision at a similar party, with similar one-dimensional crowd, in the same part of town. Not that long ago, she was just a socially active girl who loved Coldplay, but now that very same love made her an aberration, a pervert almost. With a predominantly female fan base, an emotionality score of 97% and a mathematical precision index of 0.042 Coldplay was officially classified as gender-specific music. As a result, Coldplay’s music was banned from public life, only to be enjoyed under strict conditions, at parties like the one she just left, minimising the impact on normal people.

They passed each other on the street that night, like they did a hundred times before. He never noticed her under shimmering neon lights, and all she ever saw were bright yellow stars above. A data date meant, missed on many a lonely night.