Category: Memories

I want to break free

With Bohemian Rhapsody in the cinema it is time to rethink and clarify my position on Queen and Freddie Mercury.I must have loved the band when I was young. After all, at primary school me and my friends imitated Queen on stage. I don’t remember which song we pretended to play. I only remember that…


Do they hear us calling?

The setting could have been awkward but felt completely natural. A bedroom, single bed against the wall, a small desk in the corner, no other furniture. In retrospect, the absence of furniture surprises me, but then again, that’s the way me and my friends were living. High school teenagers, still living with their parents, with…


Film Noir

I first heard OK Computer in the bus during a power outage that stopped all train traffic. I still remember the sensation of Paranoid Android hitting my brain. I first heard The velvet Underground & Nico on my Walkman, cycling to a sports event. The relative conventionality of Sunday Morning almost made me switch it…


Give me convenience

Because I was too young, Because I was too shy and too scared, Because I was too young, (not) much too young, Because fear was not my best friend, Because I was (still not Neil) young and fading away already, Because the spotlight frightened me (and still does decades later), But mainly because I was…


Play for today (and yesterday too)

The other day I suddenly stopped in my tracks and did nothing for almost 4 minutes. The occasion…my Ipod decided to play an early Cure song, ‘Play for Today’. What’s with this song, why does it make me stop, do nothing and go back in time? The answer essentially is that ‘Play for Today’ defined…


Teenage Wildlife

Friends are like clothes, they are either in or out of fashion, they make you look good or not. As a teenager I defined style as the point where politics and music intersected.The Clash were the only band that mattered and after reading Orwell’s ‘Homage to Catalonia’ I ruled out communism in favour of anarchism…


Living too late (the death of Mark E. Smith)

The artists who defined my youth all die at a frightening pace. It almost feels like routine. Soon my youth will be erased. Soon I will look at the musical landscape and feel nothing. No joy, no hate, no melancholy, no nausea. Losing my youth also means losing originality, chaos, excitement and unpredictability. What’s the…


The loss of my youth

In 1985 I composed my first poem under the friendly light of a lamppost after crashing with my bicycle in the middle of the night. I crashed because I was drunk, the result of spending yet another night at ‘De Boemerang’. It was a bit of a strange place. Mopeds parked outside, routine fights between…


Punk and Puberty in three episodes

Scene 1 – Iggy Pop playbacking ‘Lust for Life’ on Toppop. I was 8 years old. Toppop was our primary channel of (new) music in the 1970’s. I didn’t see at the time how drugged up Iggy was, nor did I notice how paper-thin he was or the sloppy make up on his body. I…


Ghost in the machine

When I was 17 I read Arthur Koestler’s ‘Ghost in the machine’ (1967). I didn’t understand half of the book, but it still left a big impression.Taking the relationship between mind and body as a starting point, Koestler tries to explain why people have a tendency towards (self-)destruction. According to him it all boils down…


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